Have Gen Z normalized loneliness? My experience with the loneliness Generation
The feeling of not having many friends is an interesting one for me. Sometimes everything is perfect and quiet, but other times I have this strong and overwhelming feeling of wanting to have lots of friends to just go out and get drunk together. But how am I supposed to connect with people when they’re not nearly as open as they used to be in kindergarten? I guess all I’m saying is that it’s really hard to make friends when you’re at your 20s. And why is it so hard? I often think one of the reasons is that we end up solely focusing on our careers and our own ideas.
You’re probably thinking that my loneliness is just another irrelevant privileged people feeling. Maybe you’re right. But don’t you think this at the very least a little sad? When did people become so selfish that they only look for and at themselves?
But have gen z normalized loneliness?
I was curious to answer this question, so I went I little deeper than usual to write this blog. Deeper both inside myself and in research. A survey conducted by a U.S. national health insurance Cigna from 2018 showed that 54% of adults said they feel no one knows them well, and half of the participants said they always or sometimes feel alone. So, not only do I feel this way, but a significant part of my generation does as well. I often see people at college eating by themselves and looking at their phones. Those situations make me wonder “is this their fault? Or do other people just won’t accept them into their social bubbles?”. Perhaps taking in a new member into their group causes a discomfort that most people try to avoid, causing them to prefer to keep only the same people around.
What is funny is that I’m a really sociable guy. I can talk to anyone about anything without feeling any discomfort. But it’s really been really hard to connect and feel belonged in a new group.
What I’m trying to say is…
Don’t get me wrong, I do have a few friends, but one of my best friends lives in Canada. I guess all I’m trying to say with all this is that I really miss having a good friend around. Someone who would genuinely hangout with me no matter the circumstances, time, or place. It has been difficult to find a new friend near me who’s down to just go for a walk or to do nothing together. And maybe friends like Pedro, who don’t hesitate to teach you all about how to become a barista by hand drawing a two-page brochure about all these different types of coffee, are rare to find.
The feeling of belonging in a group has passed by me a long time ago, now I just want to work. Now I’m working on finding myself. And maybe by focusing on me and my favourite things, good people will actually come to find me too as they find themselves.
